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Monday, July 28, 2008

.. i bow down to you

Mother of mine you gave to me,
All of my life to do as i please,
I own everything i have to you,
Mother sweet mother of mine.

Mother of mine when i was young
You showed me the right way
Things should be done,
Without your love where would i be,
Mother sweet mother of mine.

Mother you gave me happiness,
Much more than words can say,
I pray the lord that he may bless you,
Every night and every day.

Mother of mine now i am grown
And i can walk straight all on my own,
I'd like to give you what you gave to me,
Mother sweet mother of mine.

This was the prayer i had in my 10th class. one of the best ode on mother..

Communion.....

I'm mazed into the labyrinth of my own thoughts.. not even a single way out of this.. no more my heart is able to sustain the strain ...Lift me in Your arms.. so that i can be at peace for a while.. Why You gave this birth.. did i ask You.. You do whatever You feel like and i have no rights.... and the worst is when You don't even bother to answer me.. I'm talking to You .. how many times do i have to tell You.. how long You will make me wait like this.. i don't want to wait.. Speak to me at least when m in such state.. I don't want to lose myself thus.... Give me hint..Show me my calling .. and then blame me if i don't listen to that.. I'll You know.. My lips uttered .. No to Your Existence... but if this is what i think then why i keep on talking to You.. because You exist.. somewhere.. hidden from me.. my mortal eyes..One day i know.. even You will ask for the clarifications.. aaah.. what a pain that would be to me..

Like a sunflower which follows every movement of the sun
so i turn towards you to follow you my lord
in simplicity , charity i follow
in simplicity honesty i follow
in simplicity fidelity i follow
like a sunflower which follows every movement of the sun
so i turn towards you my lord..




My lost world.....

How beautiful it sounds when someone says i'm missing you.. when someone says i had nobody to turn to so i turned to you..i was knew that you are the only one whom i can look back to and will not let me down..i was feeling low.. and knew talking to you can uplift my spirits even if you talk for few seconds.. it's really a brilliant feeling when you see someone considers you this much importance..

Of course Sonu you can call me anytime.. wake me from deep sleep and say .. wanna talk to you.. i will be happy to hear you out little girl..

I'm glad that Sonu felt so.... i just am glad.. and what i like about her is that she says everything with so assurance in her voice.. i do remember when she was in Bangalore.. she called up and said I'm missing you.. actually i messaged her just a good night message and in turn she called up and said "m missing you Prachi.. and then after talking a while she bid goodnight to me.. then white light flashes on my mobile and the message said.. do good night messages regularly.. i love reading them.. today i have so many reasons to be glad of..

Till date she was in Delhi never on new year i had been alone.. 2006 was the last new year eve.. and count down night that we spent together..
and then never my new years went good..


i remember in 2003 or 04.. i don't remember exactly.. it was raining on the night of 31st Dec.. star gold was showing Titanic and we both set out for evening masti to Lal Quarter..
back at home....coke, pop corns, "mungfali-revri-gazzak" and "razai".. room heater.. and all of us .. me.. sonu.. ma.. papa.. pinku.. cheena.. in one razai.. and sab khane peene ka saman in the middle and watching new year programs..and later in night we danced.. in PJs.. ohh what great fun we had..

whole night dancing .. and then we flung our bodies on bed.. and after some efforts and fights with Pinku.. made him switched off lights of our room and shut the door behind..
and then we girls cuddled together and drowned down into deep slumber..

It was amazing.. we're still in college..
and lo! i forgot that first CP trip .. that was the first time we both girls went to Connaught Place (CP) for first time on our own.. each saying at home .. she know all routes.. hahahaha and none of us knew any route.. just got on to the bus.. (as far as i can force my memory it was 317) and went for adventure.. spent whole money in purchasing room posters, trinkets, and several other useless things.. and later on the way devised plans what to say at home for getting late..

we're simply crazy for room posters..ice creams on chilling December nights.. golgappe..night walks..late night girlie talks and Sonu's statement that "I'm romantic kind of person and Prachi you are not.." i still wonder why she felt so...but this hardly mattered to me..in those days .. and even today..

and yeah how can i forget tradition of dress exchanges..i was real crazy for her purple top... and she was crazy for every dress of mine.. jab aati tab ek utha kar bhaag jaati..
pehle i was little fat and she was lean.. then i got lean.. reduced about 8 kgs.. and became equal to her.. and then she gained weight.. and finally things balanced in between us and both could use each other's dresses...

aur woh Pinni banwana aunty ke sath..
i miss those wonderful days.. i wish i could get them back.. i want to live in my past ..
one which had good memories...

every word.. that you wrote gives a new derfinition to me..

deep...one of the best writers i have ever seen in my life 8:08 AM

Me: it's b' oz u love me 8:10 AM
d for daffar.. love you 8:10 AM

deep...nahin 8:12 AM

deep..this is a honest statement 8:13 AM
pakka se
i would love to see u writing some novel or anything someday
tumhari writing hamesha serious hoti hai
n at times it may not appeal to normal people who r nt very good in english
i dun think u can add humor in yr writing...n make it simple...may b like Chetan Bhagat whose writing appeal to common man,.,,
u love to use tough words which may appeal to certain intellectuals only

was written long time back....

when language becomes deficient in expressing what all your soul contains, comes in play your touch.. human touch is such an intense thing that can express all joys.. n sorrows with utmost intensity..it can express your love.. love that can n never be summed up in words.. that can not be felt with eyes.. that can never be uttered out...warmth that your touch lends.. the feel of support that your touch lends on an old man's arm.. .. your hands caressing a child provides more security or your words?.. i may be sounding weird.. since lots of things are in sway in my mind..do i really think.. but i never felt so...?