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Wednesday, November 19, 2008

VOID


I don't know why I'm feeling a void in me. It's as if something is lost. I keep searching in and out and do not get anything...May be i know but am not ready to accept it.. yeah this is true. most of the time i am not ready to accept reality...

Sonu wants to get settled.. wants to get married.. do not feel like living alone anymore... she is tired of running and seeing the world all alone.. she is tired of loving things and enjoying life alone... she is tired of an empty space in bed beside her.... she wants to have an arm under her head in night.. she wants to get cuddled when in dreams... she wanted to nestled in some strong arms and forget daily woes.. she wants to care for someone.. live for someone.. tend to someone's needs......cook for someone and tantalize the taste buds... aahaaa!!.. what a beauty lies in femininity... she has multiple roles in one single minute.... with one person.. she lives manifolds life...

I know this is not strange stuff.. it's the time when she should get settled.. i could sense that intensity and urgency.. in her voice today.. the way she said,"Prachi, i want to get married, it's really good in old days people used to marry their daughter's off in time at least they were spared from these lonely pangs...pains of this yearning........"

I know not honey what you spoke of.. and if i know I'm not going to keep thinking of this.. lest my ruin is almost reached.... you don't know what i'm struggling with....

What should i say.. what i want.. i said no.. my case is little opposite.. i don't want to get settled.. she felt me sounding strange.. just-not-me kind of things i uttered... but.. i had no other option... why this happens... girls come to know that it's time to get settled.. and guys don't.. well ... i have no clue.. and if i have then also i won't pronounce it in any case...

Nanny too needs someone to hold on to.. someone who can think of her and be with her...

And, I'm the lucky one... :) !!!!!!!!!! ???????????????

A yearning to not be alone while walking.. a yearning to not to be alone while it's raining.... a yearning to not to be looking blank when you want to look up to..... a yearning to be yearned for.....

life is a game and play it.. life is an ice cream so eat it before it melts... life is a cycle ride it... life is a riddle solve it......

Life is what? haaah.. i have been through thousand many definitions.. and some kiddish ones just spelled few lines before(life is....so ... it)


Life is a passion.. a desire.. a longing... a wish.... a dream.. a mystery... a fantasy..... a nightmare........ A VOID ..............how to fill it???