I'll Wait and Will Keep Understanding Those Silences That Speak Tongue Of Your Heart!!
Aaha !!! how light i am feeling today. Nanny wants to talk. How it hurts me to see her getting frozen behind her fake smile. I used to think what should i do.. do i need to force her and make her realize that girl you are losing yourself somewhere.... damn you need to think something about yourself... she said, i need to talk.. lot has been pent up.. and i was so damn happy.. i went down to her place in hope that she will speak up this time..... but, again i sensed the very second i stepped foot in her room .. that she is till not ready... i waited patiently .. and watched her fading smile now and then and see the plight couldn't say anything.... since she is not the one who can be handled this way.. a very soft china piece her heart is....
I have been missing her badly.. and knew she misses too but do not say anything.. i can never forget these words of hers .. though i waited for them since long but honestly i didn't like them.. i felt a pain.. deep down in the dark recesses of my heart....
Nanny:::: Missing u sweetie!
U always complain dat i dun shatre.
Not dat i dun want 2 or deres nothin 2 tel u.
On d contrary deres so much stored up in me.
U hv no idea.
I rem u writing in 1 of ur mails dat u wr losing urself.
Wel my dear i hv already LOST myself!
I hv bn waiting since long nanny. ::::Nicky
I luv u so much tht it hrts me seeing u
freezing bhnd ur smile
Nanny:::: Its not like i neva tried.
But jus cudnt bring myself 2 talk ever
Sumthin dat ws so integral 2 me has become d most diff thing.
But i wanna let go now.
I wll cm dwn to Siliguri ::::Nicky
if u say yes 1nc
if u say u want to talk
Ohh dear i know what you have been through. But, i can just imagine and understand . You are the one going through that turmoil . I know what kind of stage you have been through.. Let me be your companion dear. let me listen to you.. you need that.. this is the reason why i have been desperate to get someone for you.... you know nanny it happens we need someone to listen to us... and mostly someone who can listen to those silences that will be rendered meaningless otherwise...
Man say that they are simple and have no complex characters. But, they don't know what kind of feeling it is to have a companion .. i think they know.. all this but as it is a patriarchal society .. they are bred that way.. it's in the very roots that men are bound to think that they are not complex like we women and do not wail or cry like us... but once broken they shatter the way women can never and that time it's the women who can heal their broken being... nurturer.... mother by essence..and this is the fact they keep on negating till the day they broke.. and every man breaks once in the lifetime.. after all a mortal soul can endure how much.....it needs solace..... ask them how it feels to lie your tired head on a bosom... and they will fall short of words... they glide into a sleep that relaxes and rejuvenates their spirit..
Don't led yourself to such a stage when you will not be able to handle yourself......
Do You remember Goblin Market?